My Sexual Fantasy: Intro

I have a mixed and relatively complicated sexual fantasy. My fantasy involves kidnap, bondage, BDSM, and rape. The most unique thing about this is well, some day in July, last month, I realized when I masturbate, I imagine myself as the woman. Never before did I truly find the fact that I imagined myself as a woman while masturbating odd. I just never thought what other guys think about when they masturbate. Doing some research on Google, I discovered the term: autogynephilia. It means a male who gets turned on by the thought that he is a woman during sexual activity.

In my kidnap, bondage, and rape fantasies, I am not the one doing the kidnapping, gagging, tying up, and penetration. I am the sexy, beautiful woman who is often wearing pantyhose, stockings, and lingerie who is taken against my will, bound, gagged, submissive, tortured for sexual purposes, and being ravaged sexually. I imagine myself as the woman pleading, "No, please, don't put that in my mouth! Noo! (muffled)" I imagine myself still wearing these feminine articles of clothing while being forced. I am not completely naked. I desire to wear any type of sexy feminine clothing in my fantasies but I have a particularily strong fetish for pantyhose, thigh-high stockings, and sexy underwear or thongs. Sexy high heels also turn me on. I attempt to thin my thighs to look more feminine as well since a woman's legs are absolutely a must to be beautiful.

I desire to be fucked and have orgasm after orgasm, becoming more intense as they come. I am a masochist to a certain degree. I don't like too much pain but a slightly intolerable level of pain along with the bondage is so hot.

My key turn-ons: Me as a BEAUTIFUL, YOUNG WOMAN dressed SEXY in LINGERIE, NYLONS (thigh high STOCKINGS or PANTYHOSE), HIGH HEELS, and other FEMININE clothing being KIDNAPPED realistically by one individual (no gang rape), BONDAGE (being BOUND and GAGGED AGAINST MY WILL and STRUGGLING), taken to his secret dungeon (place where he can ravage me in private and that my pleads and screams will go unheard) to be SEXUALLY TORTURED (some pain), RAPED, and FORCED TO ORGASM INTENSELY for MULTIPLE times. I would be constantly STRUGGLING, PLEADING (even if gagged), and in SUBMISSION to a dominant, fit and in-shape man who is wearing a ski mask- man is faceless- and RAVAGES me.