Learning About BDSM

I've known since I was a kid- perhaps even in elementary school or younger- that being tied up gives me sexual thrill. I'm not sure I understood that this feeling and urge had to do with my sexuality at that early of an age but I remember watching Discovery Channel's New Detectives and FBI Files shows when I was no older than in 3rd grade approximately  and feeling turned on when seeing the re-enactments of women being kidnapped, tied, and gagged- I do want to state for clarity that these are my fantasies and the line between fantasy and reality exists. And in my past, I have learned about bondage, the term that pinpoints my sexual desire; I remember the feeling when I first discovered the term, bondage, along with BDSM. But it was not until today when I really started to study BDSM in terms of reading lots and lots of educational and informational articles online. In the past, I've more or less looked around online, read a bit here and there on BDSM and of course, gradually, over the span of many years, viewed countless amounts of pictures and videos that turned me on back then but nowadays would be considered oh so ever soft, all the way to the hardcore porn like that of the Sex & Submission Pornography. I find it hard to write about these types of things because when I do have the sexual energy to focus on these things, I want to orgasm. But after I orgasm, I lose that sexual motivation to write in-depth articles about myself in regards to who I am sexually. It's hard at times but there is definitely stuff I want to explore and experience sexually in the future.

Here are some of the websites I was reading about just before typing this up:
https://www.google.com/search?client=opera&q=how+can+a+male+be+submissive&sourceid=opera&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&channel=suggest

http://www.submissiveguide.com/

http://www.submissiveguide.com/2012/10/is-your-heart-truly-in-it-fulfilling-submission-needs-desire/

http://voices.yahoo.com/5-things-submissive-wants-dominant-1785521.html?cat=7

http://voices.yahoo.com/5-things-dominants-want-submissive-1785209.html?cat=7

http://voices.yahoo.com/bdsm-101-different-types-submissive-freaks-1820616.html?cat=7

http://voices.yahoo.com/types-submissive-men-women-avoid-looking-1910990.html?cat=7

http://voices.yahoo.com/bdsm-meaning-collar-types-collars-1933584.html?cat=7

http://voices.yahoo.com/bdsm-safety-hard-limits-soft-limits-618422.html?cat=41

http://voices.yahoo.com/bdsm-beginners-bondage-basics-76577.html?cat=41

From reading these, a thought occurred to me of wanting to find my own voice soft, eloquent, and feminine and so it is symbolic and representative of a submissive.
Google Search: how to soften your voice

https://www.google.com/#hl=en&safe=off&tbo=d&output=search&sclient=psy-ab&q=how+to+soften+your+voice&oq=how+to+soften+your+voice&gs_l=hp.3..0l2j0i8i30j0i22.1073.5387.0.5578.24.21.0.0.0.0.381.4536.0j7j11j2.20.0.les%3Bepsugrerhigh..0.0...1.1.5I9tSJbU-To&pbx=1&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.&bvm=bv.1355325884,d.cGE&fp=465bcc43df61601f&bpcl=39967673&biw=1366&bih=667

http://www.chacha.com/question/is-there-a-way-to-soften-your-voice-if-your-a-girl
"If you want to soften your speaking voice because you've been told you are too loud, try a more breathy voice. It is very difficult to be loud when breathing out a little more than usual, when talking. ChaCha!"

I like that tip.

Besides having shy tendencies, I'd imagine if I loved my voice, I would have less of a problem being vocal, even as a sub.


For a future use, when I have the time to be consistent in putting time into this blog, I want to write about my thoughts, feelings, and insights in regards to each article as I feel I will have interesting and sexually thrilling thoughts that come to me as I read these articles and want to make note of.